2020 Why What Where When

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IAC "Help Desk"
IAC "Help Desk"
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2020 Why What Where When

Post by Amskeptic » Tue Feb 18, 2020 7:02 pm

Welcome to Itinerant Air-Cooled's eighteenth lap of America to help you keep your air-cooled VW in good shape.

This visit is more of an investment than an "expense". After eighteen years, I remain convinced that the best mechanic to work on your beloved Volkswagen is you. Your terror and anxiety are channeled effectively towards careful, clean, thorough work, and your inestimable reward is the flood of relief when you proudly drive down the road as the master caretaker of an appreciating investment.

Another advantage of the IAC day that you are the cheapest option for any maintenance and repair that may be needed. As you become familiar with your VW, you are much more likely to do the work required in a timely fashion without putting off the little things that can turn into big ($$) things. The Itinerant Air-Cooled day challenges both your mind and your stamina. Be prepared for nine hours straight through.

Parts needed are your responsibility. We can guess what you may need, but surprises come up all the time. Our winter correspondence will be helpful to you. Utilize it! If, on our appointment day, you should find that you are disappointed that the absence of a part stops us cold, cheer up. There are always more projects to dive into, and for me, it is a pleasure to hand off the final reassembly to you.
That is our goal, remember?

Your work environment needs to be clean and organized, and with precipitation ever-increasing, we must plan for a dry environment to do our very best work. If you are in a rain-drenched climate, please try to have a serious weather-proof alternative available. Make a beautiful new friendship with a hitherto unknown neighbor, discover your skills with lean-to carpentry and tarp, whatever it takes, have a garage at the ready if rain is forecast.

Please have paper towels, an oil drain container, a couple of cans of GumOut™ carb spray (that's GumOut™, not Berrymans or ChemTool or the other formulations that strip paint, GumOut™) still available at WalMart for $3.14 a can or $5.59 at Advance or whatever. Try to rustle up a container of Valvoline DuraBlend semi-synthetic molybdenum-fortified grease OR Valvoline fully-synthetic grease. It is the best grease that can meet all of our requirements in your VW.

9:00AM - we begin with a cup of coffee, a pen and real 8 1/2 x 11 paper.
After greeting the dog and going over the list you have prepared, we tackle the cold-required items like valve adjustments, retorques, and choke checks. If you are a neophyte, we will likely do an entire tune-up together. If you are a surviving Prior IAC Appointment graduate, we will swan dive into the project at hand.

Lunch is your responsibility. If you need it, make sure you carve out a moment.
Chances are, I will make it a working lunch with more 8 1/2x11 diagrams for your future reference.

6:00PM - work must wind down or we both choose to go into official overtime ($64.00/hr).

You will have paid your $320.00 PayPal deposit if I am standing at your door at 9:00AM. I will not be leaving your door at 6:30PM without a balance of $320.00 cash. Please don't make us wander around town looking for an ATM at 9:00PM.

I am a consultant. You are paying for my knowledge. If I pick up a tool, it is to hand it to you. I could not and cannot should not and shall not accept liability for any of the work performed on your vehicle nor any incidental consequential coincidental consequent incident accident coincident and subsequent to our visit. Asbestosis, massive explosions, mangling disfigurement, property destruction, dead children and/or pets, burned down house, thrown connecting rod, horrible test-drive crash, all can happen at any time.

The reason we have never had a claim is that
Attentiveness to The Present Is Critical And I Will Not Allow Distraction To Place Us At-Risk

Cell phone access shall be limited in 2020 to agreed-upon breaks.

Please PM me with:
a) what model of Volkswagen you own, any modifications?
b) your List of Concerns from most-important to least-important (all of them, we'll edit later).
c) a rundown of your mechanical aptitude, things you'd like to learn?
d) work environment rain-proof and/or plan b for a rainy day?
e) is this a Road Warrior or a weekend putterer?

Step up! There is no better steward of your fine Volkswagen than you!

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