Itinerant Air-Cooled Greetings From Michigan
Posted: Sat May 29, 2010 7:32 am
Man, what a sensitive bunch of pansies here in Michigan. That's right. Every single customer in Michigan was all worried about the appearance of their butts. And since they are all easily over 40 years old, IF NOT 50 EVEN, how was I going to point out that . . . well, butts do finally succumb to gravity and they spread like aluvial plain deltas, and they creep like glaciers. But no. These Michiganers demanded a little lift.
So, for the legions of readers right here, please note:
Do not ever assume that your butt is sagging until you load up the front with two hefty heifers. Once so loaded, place a bubble protractor or spirit scale on the sliding door sill. If it is level, your butt is fine, really, you look just as pert as can be.
If you remember from 2008:
. . . then you are prepared for this this year:
See, Don daringly defies entropy with a cavalier sweep of his arm and a risque "it's here somewhere". It must be said, however, that I actually saw his garage floor this year (it is a mosaic of tile, who woulda knew?).
After a truncated test drive "Don, I do not want to drive with that sound", we launched into an investigation of the rear wheel bearing and suspension adjustment, bravely pulling wrenches and sockets and air hoses and solvents and sandpaper and actual talcum powder in a can (that was a good garage-find that Don would just cooly claim was part of his special chaos retrieval system). It was warm and humid. I placed a pan under the brake line I had to remove. The pan was to "catch" the fluid so it would not spread all over the driveway. The pan was kicked over by yours truly so the fluid could have a chance to spread all over the driveway. Brake fluid on my drop towel, sticky humidity, tools willy-nilly, undercarriage crap galore shaken loose by the air tools, what more can we add? I'll tell you. Add a balky dowel pin in the backing plate anchor that Don once again had to drill out (expertly like his exhaust stud of a couple years ago) and put brake fluid soaked drill shavings all up your shirt that already has been assaulted by grease and rust plus sweat and now, the garnishment, the piece d' resistance, Mosquito Bites!
Don sent me on my way after a seriously appreciated 11:00PM dinner, and I drove to the other call to find another butt-sag concerned Michigan bus pilot. "Is my butt too low?" "Of course not sweetie, that's the way God made you." "No, my bus! Is my bus too low in the back?"
VW specifically made the bus and every other rear-engined air-cooled car of theirs sit higher in the front. If you want to see if the car is correctly sprung, put two people in the front seats and you should have a level sill. The issue with not seeing out of the rear view mirror in a bus can be attributed to the safety regulations that no longer allowed the rear view mirror to hang as low as it used to in the '69 and earlier buses.
What a lucky break for me, my second rear suspension adjustment in as many days had air tools AGAIN! and we needed them too, those rear suspension bolts and nuts were rusted and annoyed at being disturbed.
For fun, TrollFromDownBelow and I decided to repack the left side CV joints and replace the differential side cover oil seal. That removed seal looked like a psychotic chainsaw massacre. Sorry.
A brief ode to a surprising car, this wagon was clearly loved at some point, and it has an attitude, the last of the biiiig American V8 (LT1 Corvette engine too!) rear-wheel drive Chevy Caprice-derived Vista Cruiser station wagons with rear air brakes just n case (oh all right they are just vent wings, but still), this car belongs to a friend of Troll's.
On my way to Indiana to restore PoptopTom's bus to Mobile Status. Wish us well. He NEEDS to drive a VW around! NOW!
Colin
So, for the legions of readers right here, please note:
Do not ever assume that your butt is sagging until you load up the front with two hefty heifers. Once so loaded, place a bubble protractor or spirit scale on the sliding door sill. If it is level, your butt is fine, really, you look just as pert as can be.
If you remember from 2008:
. . . then you are prepared for this this year:
See, Don daringly defies entropy with a cavalier sweep of his arm and a risque "it's here somewhere". It must be said, however, that I actually saw his garage floor this year (it is a mosaic of tile, who woulda knew?).
After a truncated test drive "Don, I do not want to drive with that sound", we launched into an investigation of the rear wheel bearing and suspension adjustment, bravely pulling wrenches and sockets and air hoses and solvents and sandpaper and actual talcum powder in a can (that was a good garage-find that Don would just cooly claim was part of his special chaos retrieval system). It was warm and humid. I placed a pan under the brake line I had to remove. The pan was to "catch" the fluid so it would not spread all over the driveway. The pan was kicked over by yours truly so the fluid could have a chance to spread all over the driveway. Brake fluid on my drop towel, sticky humidity, tools willy-nilly, undercarriage crap galore shaken loose by the air tools, what more can we add? I'll tell you. Add a balky dowel pin in the backing plate anchor that Don once again had to drill out (expertly like his exhaust stud of a couple years ago) and put brake fluid soaked drill shavings all up your shirt that already has been assaulted by grease and rust plus sweat and now, the garnishment, the piece d' resistance, Mosquito Bites!
Don sent me on my way after a seriously appreciated 11:00PM dinner, and I drove to the other call to find another butt-sag concerned Michigan bus pilot. "Is my butt too low?" "Of course not sweetie, that's the way God made you." "No, my bus! Is my bus too low in the back?"
VW specifically made the bus and every other rear-engined air-cooled car of theirs sit higher in the front. If you want to see if the car is correctly sprung, put two people in the front seats and you should have a level sill. The issue with not seeing out of the rear view mirror in a bus can be attributed to the safety regulations that no longer allowed the rear view mirror to hang as low as it used to in the '69 and earlier buses.
What a lucky break for me, my second rear suspension adjustment in as many days had air tools AGAIN! and we needed them too, those rear suspension bolts and nuts were rusted and annoyed at being disturbed.
For fun, TrollFromDownBelow and I decided to repack the left side CV joints and replace the differential side cover oil seal. That removed seal looked like a psychotic chainsaw massacre. Sorry.
A brief ode to a surprising car, this wagon was clearly loved at some point, and it has an attitude, the last of the biiiig American V8 (LT1 Corvette engine too!) rear-wheel drive Chevy Caprice-derived Vista Cruiser station wagons with rear air brakes just n case (oh all right they are just vent wings, but still), this car belongs to a friend of Troll's.
On my way to Indiana to restore PoptopTom's bus to Mobile Status. Wish us well. He NEEDS to drive a VW around! NOW!
Colin