Itinerant Air-Cooled Greetings From Battle Creek MI
Posted: Mon Oct 01, 2007 3:07 pm
You all might not know that I am the multi-millionaire CEO of Kellogg's and am devoted to rotting out the teeth of all of your precious children before their fifth birthday.
So, anyways, I thought I would stop by the office and pick up my mail on my way through. "My, that's quite the tan," sniffed my secretary who I pay only $8.75 an hour. "Why hello there Mr. Kellogg," boomed that toady VP of Marketing, "it is good to see you stop by once in a while, hahaha. . . that's quite the tan you got there, hahah, if you wore clothes, perhaps you'd have slightly less of a tan, heh, haha." "Shut the hell up," I replied cheerfully as I instructed the courier to run and get the mail room cart to dump all of my Inbox messages into. "Send them over to the shredder." "Sir?" "You heard me." But the top inbox Post-It note caught my attention. "RSVP ASAP. Chiang Shanghou-Nijongf called, what to do with the Frosted Flakes ethylene glycol, CALL." Too late. That one goes to the shredder too, I guess, screw 'em, I'm air-cooled. "Mr. Kellogg, WE already DELAYED our Statement Of Earnings, you MUST sign off this accounting verification. Mr. Kellogg, where are you GOING?" "TrollFrom DownBelow's if you must know." "EXCUSE ME?" "Bye."
Yes, life is good, just gotta steer clear of the Board on my way out to hit the road to the Detroit. . . "Mr. Kellogg, Mr. Kellogg, please, a minute?" "Yes, what is it?" "The Gulfstream, it's about the Gulfstream, the Board wants to sell it because you refuse to use it and we have a group of annoyed VPs who think the lease rules should be relaxed so they can use it." "Of course, where is the requisition form?" "Um, gee, really, wait a sec, it's right here, wow!" "Point out to the Board that I have initialed. . . here, see? that the jet is to be sold to the second highest bidder only."
Yeah right.
So it is 62* and raining steadily with lots of mist all over the I-94 corridor. Good thing I called The Sage before hitting Traverse City. . . . "I'm in Iowa! My bus won't run, I am waiting for a tow!" "Can I come help you?" "Ah, no. I have a guy out here, I have to fly to Denver, I'll pick it up on my way back." So I was going to use this free day (this Wrecked My Budget free day) to get my Fall Weatherproofing done with paint/undercoat touch-ups, but the rain said "no."
As did my credit card when I gassed up this morning. . . .
Colin
So, anyways, I thought I would stop by the office and pick up my mail on my way through. "My, that's quite the tan," sniffed my secretary who I pay only $8.75 an hour. "Why hello there Mr. Kellogg," boomed that toady VP of Marketing, "it is good to see you stop by once in a while, hahaha. . . that's quite the tan you got there, hahah, if you wore clothes, perhaps you'd have slightly less of a tan, heh, haha." "Shut the hell up," I replied cheerfully as I instructed the courier to run and get the mail room cart to dump all of my Inbox messages into. "Send them over to the shredder." "Sir?" "You heard me." But the top inbox Post-It note caught my attention. "RSVP ASAP. Chiang Shanghou-Nijongf called, what to do with the Frosted Flakes ethylene glycol, CALL." Too late. That one goes to the shredder too, I guess, screw 'em, I'm air-cooled. "Mr. Kellogg, WE already DELAYED our Statement Of Earnings, you MUST sign off this accounting verification. Mr. Kellogg, where are you GOING?" "TrollFrom DownBelow's if you must know." "EXCUSE ME?" "Bye."
Yes, life is good, just gotta steer clear of the Board on my way out to hit the road to the Detroit. . . "Mr. Kellogg, Mr. Kellogg, please, a minute?" "Yes, what is it?" "The Gulfstream, it's about the Gulfstream, the Board wants to sell it because you refuse to use it and we have a group of annoyed VPs who think the lease rules should be relaxed so they can use it." "Of course, where is the requisition form?" "Um, gee, really, wait a sec, it's right here, wow!" "Point out to the Board that I have initialed. . . here, see? that the jet is to be sold to the second highest bidder only."
Yeah right.
So it is 62* and raining steadily with lots of mist all over the I-94 corridor. Good thing I called The Sage before hitting Traverse City. . . . "I'm in Iowa! My bus won't run, I am waiting for a tow!" "Can I come help you?" "Ah, no. I have a guy out here, I have to fly to Denver, I'll pick it up on my way back." So I was going to use this free day (this Wrecked My Budget free day) to get my Fall Weatherproofing done with paint/undercoat touch-ups, but the rain said "no."
As did my credit card when I gassed up this morning. . . .
Colin