Can someone please tell me

hambone · Post by **hambone** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 9:36 am

What the hell I'm supposed to be doing with my life? Birth-school-job-crusty-death.....it all seems so limiting and entraping.
thanks!
-Bob

Adventurewagen · Post by **Adventurewagen** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:07 am

Working on the bus and taking camping trips into the wilderness, duh.

It's all about the journey, if you condense it the whole thing becomes depressing. We are born, live a short life relative to the earth, we try to reproduce to keep the species alive, maybe tinker with a few things but mostly we just reproduce and then die.

I think you've got seasonal depression, go buy yourself a sun light :)

mattg · Post by **mattg** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:22 am

That is quite a question to throw around. Sounds like you are doing some soul searching. Im not sure that I have found the meaning of life and our existance. When I was younger I didnt really think about things like this but as I get older I find myself second guessing myself about past decisions. I think it is important to make yourself happy and surround yourself with people you love. This is easier said than done. I am one of those people who is never really satisfied. I have been trying these days to take one day at a time and to focus my energy on making those around me my family the number one priority. Work is work. For me it gets so boring sometimes that I feel like I am wasting my time here - which I probably am working for someone else to pad their pockets. One thing I know for sure is that time goes by so fast - not fast enough when Im at work. if you find any answers out there let me know. However sometimes what you are looking for is right in front of your face and you dont even know it.

vwlover77 · Post by **vwlover77** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:26 am

Spending even a little time helping the less fortunate, in whatever way is interesting and works for you, can really make a difference.

Sure, it doesn't answer the big questions, but it feels pretty good. One of the best "vacation" weeks I ever spent was last June in Biloxi, MS working on a Katrina house. Never sweated so much in my life, but would do it again in a heartbeat....

Velokid1 · Post by **Velokid1** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:31 am

You were meant to be Hambone, whether you like it or not. I know it can feel limiting being stuck in your own story, but you can change it when you want to and... if it makes you feel any better, I think you rock.

Get outdoors as often as you can, because that's obviously something that feeds your soul. I'm the same way. My life used to consist of being outdoors 50% of my day and indoors 50%... I always had a hunch I wouldn't want an indoor job, especially in a cubicle

, but now I know with certainty that this isn't going to cut it for much longer and I will never fall into this again.

Point being... yesterday I got home from work and was walking up the wooded hill to our neighbors where I had dropped off my dog for the day (Maynard loves play dates with his buddy, Romeo). It has snowed here and the pines are so quiet and the sun was setting behind the Butte and when I came in the house I said, "Honey, I just love being outdoors and I really miss it."

Her: "Yeah, I know you do."
Me: "No, I mean... I really, really love the outdoors and our life is so indoors now. I feel like my passion is being choked off."
Her: "Oh gosh, don't be melodramatic."
Me: "I wish I were. What scares me is that I'm being literal."
Her: "Fish tacos sound good for dinner?"
Me: ["If I had a gun..."]

Ritter · Post by **Ritter** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:55 am

These days I always feel like I'm waiting for something to happen. I spend way too much time thinking about things like peak oil, global warming, war, how much I hate the way our country is regressing, etc. Sometimes it is borderline paralyzing. However, I still hope and dream and make fun plans for the future. Hell, I'm going cross country skiing this weekend even though it's the driest January on record around Sonoma County (=very little snow in the Sierra). Burn some oil, baby!

It's odd, but I find some actual comfort in thinking about the above catastrophic events. Perhaps the resulting chaos is the only way that humans (Americans, at least) will find true meaning in life again. You know, spend the day figuring out how to feed the kid rather than plugged into the internet chatting with you folk!

Hang in there, Hambone. One day at a time and always remember that tomorrow could be a much better day.

hambone · Post by **hambone** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 11:28 am

Thanks guys. Your points of view are very interesting.
Some people seem like they got it all together - decent career, nice house, happy family...me I take everything too damn seriously. I just don't understand how they do it.
Yes, the cube is sapping me too. "Nature" is everything, but how to make it 100% of life an still survive with a family? Gah I can't take much more of this repetition, but I also need to support 2 kids. Cry me a river eh? I'm sure there are a lot of disenfranchised people out there these days, sick of being another cog. And oddly the opposite seems to run strong, those who are content to live what has been laid down for them.
I had a really tough day yesterday, but I came home and said to my family "we are fortunate - we have our health, our love, and a roof over our heads". It really seemed to make a difference.
Velo, I hear ya about different family visions. My wife thinks I'm crazy going out into the unknown. She's happy with city life, and it does cause some friction between us. When we argue sometimes she yells at me "WELL WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO LIVE IN A SHACK AND LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!" It's pretty funny becuase it's really not a bad idea. Arizona is beautiful, Be There Fully because when yer not someday in the future you will miss certain aspects of it. (those pics are beautiful BTW)

Here's hoping for a better, kinder world were more people give a crap about one another.

PDX_Hops · Post by **PDX_Hops** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 11:29 am

I feel your pain, Hambone, For me, the "job" part of the birth-school-job-crusty-death really has me down at the moment. I'm having too many days lately where the most positive thing I can say at quittin' time is I'm 1 day closer to retirement. I've got a good job and practical skills, but work hasn't been fulfilling for a while.

I've always believed that work is not your life, it only funds your life, but recently I've had a danged hard time checking my professional dissatisfaction at the door when leaving the office. The wife and I are going on vacation in mid-February to celebrate our 10th anniversary, so hopefully I can recharge my mental batteries a bit. Plus, camping season's right around the corner!

RussellK · Post by **RussellK** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 2:00 pm

It's all about the journey

Bob- There it is. Live your life without issues and enjoy the ride.

A Yogi told me "If you are here it is because you are supposed to be" I believe that. It doesn't mean we can't change direction but it is calming.

Adventurewagen · Post by **Adventurewagen** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 3:13 pm

Man, this post is getting me down. It has, however, hit me square in the forehead for I am that unhappy cog at the moment as well.

My job is sucking the life out of me and its not even very stressful, it just sucks a big fat one. Problem for me is I don't have the mojo to want to go out and find another. It's a bad circular reference problem. I get no appreciation and have no direction at my current employment but I get paid and I'm settled into a routine that finally avoids travel which I was truly burnt out from. I'd just up and quit but I'm so lazy now I don't want to work at doing anything new so I sit here and complain about it. I'd just quit altogether but then again there is this whole house payment and college thing I'm paying for. Not exactly sure how I'd fund those without a job.

On a happier note I finally got out and worked on the bus last night. I rewired my tail lights which now include new working side markers! The PO had turned them into a total hack job but now its set up per factory install. I was thinking about the arctic circle trip, which I'd love to go but can't commit until I know where my job status is. I'm half tempted to quit at that point and just tag along.

CoPilot · Post by **CoPilot** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 3:20 pm

Hope this doesn't come off wrong, but I'm glad I'm not the only one who's stuck in a career/life rut. And the only thing I can say is that it's obviously normal.

I'm one of the youngest civilian employees in my military office. The older employees complain about the hours they work and how stressed they are, and how much time they don't spend at home...yet we all have set work hours. I don't get that?!

I know they all must think it's funny how I bounce out of here at the stroke of four, but shit, I'd rather work only for the hours in which I'm paid...and I don't want to become a work horse. The bags under their eyes and the complete loss of zest for life they exude is flippin depressing.

I prefer to live by the motto: Work to live, don't live to work.

hambone · Post by **hambone** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 3:41 pm

Not trying to depress anyone here! Quite the opposite really. I figured there would be some good ideas, as well as misery-loving-company.
It sure is hard to break out of the job-live rut. Sooner or later we all get there, and then have to reinvent ourselves, again....I've been here at the Help Desk for 5 years now (my goodness). The hours are great and good pay and benefits, but it's soooo repetitive it makes me insane. Me an Adventurewagen are 2 peas in a pod - there just doesn't seem to be anything better out there right now that pays a decent wage.
It's funny, camp season is my salvation these days. Feel very fortunate to have all those miracles abounding. But then, like any love like that, it can create suffering when one is removed and longing. Especially after the long drive back to the city and it's concrete abstractions.

Adventurewagen · Post by **Adventurewagen** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 3:42 pm

Good motto. I'm living by that right now as well. Some how though even if I try to pull only 8hrs a day its still sucking the life out of me.

I think camping season is in short order here.

vdubyah73 · Post by **vdubyah73** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 5:17 pm

My job isn't my life, it pays for my life. If your kids are grown, find someone to mentor. Doesn't have to be a kid. Just someone you have more life experience than. You seem to be a wise person Hambone, from your posts it seems you have quite a bit of life experience. Share it with someone. I don't mean in an intimate relationship. I mean more in a face to face way. Help someone make sense of their world. I believe you are an older fellow from an earlier post. You know their are alot of guys whose fathers sucked at being dads or who don't even know their dads. They can greatly benifit from someone who will speak plainly and blunty with them, gently or hard ass when needed. I'm 51, my best man friend is 80. I am that kind of friend to a 36 year old man. It's really good for both giver and receiver. Enough of that! where's John or Steve lets argue!

Bill

hambone · Post by **hambone** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 5:24 pm

It's nice to see this side of you, Bill. Good words.

Itinerant Air-Cooled

Itinerant Air-Cooled

Can someone please tell me

Can someone please tell me